Wednesday, January 6, 2016

Idiots at the Daily Beast.... or Partisan Liars?

The Daily Beast is chock - A - block staffed with idiots who have neither studied or comprehend history, the lessons of history, the individuals of history, nor the rudimentary facts of the political instruments/ideologies they ignorantly and cavalierly reference improperly & inaccurately.  Or, the Beast Staff are partisan liars - who will write anything to protect Marxist Democrats and/or slime Republicans.   I'm no fan of the establishment Republicans.  They are Democrat-Lite.  They want the same big government outcome as Democrats - albeit at a slower pace.

For the edification of those at the Daily Beast,
The following is a primer on words and terms you commonly mis-use.

FASCIST: A regulated relationship between socialist government/State and the private sector; one where the State mandates what is produced, how it is produced and by whom, and, the quantity - to artificially establish (fix) prices for political objectives.

NOTE - Hitler's NAZI Party were NOT Conservative.
National Socialists = NAZI.
Generic Fact in play... Jewish businesses operating during the NAZI regime practiced CAPITALISM! The Jew were money lenders, merchants etc.

Fascists murdered Capitalists in the NAZI regime. 
Conservatives are capitalists. 
(Fascists / NAZIs - see modern Democrat Party policy making.)

STALIN, STALINISM: Joe Stalin was a COMMUNIST!  In the history of the planet no other person (save Mao Tse Tung) exemplified the terror and cruelty resident in Marxist/Socialist government, the ideology, AND, the unbridled power the Marxist/Communist ideology provides. Near 100 millions deaths came from Joe's personal ambitions. He starved 30 million men, women, and children - his own people! He confiscated all personal property too. 
WHY did he do that?
Because all socialist forms of government - Marxism & Communism are incapable of generating sufficient amounts of anything to produce a surplus - save envy, jealousy, hatred & dependence on the STATE.

Joe's policy successes could NOT produce enough food to feed everyone.  So, Joe fed the city folks. The people producing the food were starved in Soviet slave labor farms.  The food shortages continued and were present until the demise of the USSR, as was every other product produced.


Alas, MARXISM did not afford Joe the absolute authority he craved.  Nor was it violent enough for Joe.  Communism did provide the terror and intimidation and totalitarian State Joe desired - why he changed the objective and form of government.

(MARXISM - See CURRENT - Democrat Party political objective.)


NOTHING in Conservatism may be associated to Joe Stalin, or, Communism - save the hyper ventilated anger resident in the Beast staff who want to throw word darts at people that actually risk something of value and endure the ankle biting US media is won to do. 

Historic lesson about all governments that adopted Marxist principles...
The intellectuals and reporters (Media) are the first groups screwed over, then they are murdered.  The promises made to these groups - used during the take over - never materialize.  When the groups realize they been played, they get angry and begin complaining.  The State sees this for the threat it is and MUST eliminate the groups.  The groups can inform the public they will be screwed over too.

White conservatives are not the enemy of the people.  They are enemies of the State/Democrats - as defined by Obama.  They believe in a basic moral framework that preserved nations and peoples for 5,000 years. Christianity is not the enemy. It is the source of morality and the laws that arise from the moral directive.  Some behaviors, appetites, & dependencies - chosen for decadent purposes, are not beneficial for society - no matter how many words are scribed to justify them.

Facts are hard, instrasigent things...

Please check the success in every demographic group prior to the O'Hare decision.  You will find graduation rates, two-parent families, children born in wedlock, business ownership, etc... were all higher; much higher.  Concordantly, ending segregation is an example of a fact that people like the Beast reporters do not know, or callously ignore - to the horrific detriment of the people they claim to champion.  Ending segregation did not benefit the majority of blacks - only a few did.  Rather than help their communities - they ran away - to the racist, bigoted, morally repugnant white communities - WHY?  Seems that white Christian moral standard was more attractive than remaining with their racial kinsmen.  Ending segregation enabled one thing - absolute dependence on government and the loss of freedoms in that choice.

Life is difficult. There are no guarantees that do not come with a great loss to personal and ancillary liberties.  Once addicted to dependence a person must fight mightily to escape and suffer for a time.  Life is not free from risk and harm either - see black on black violence and murder rates.  No government can protect any citizen within the nation's borders.

When the borders are porous, it exacerbates the risks and the consequences too. Allowing people who neither comprehend nor respect the founding principles of Christian morality dilutes the number of law-abiding, self reliant people - solely.

Democrat politicians and Beast reporters think they will escape the social denegration once the ideology they support achieves absolute control.  The reporters are very wrong and misinformed and ignorant of history.  The death of Marxism each time it was applied was not due to bad management.  Nor is appeasement a strategy that delivers safety.  The intellectuals currently live isolated, comfortable lives where they complain and whine perpetually about matters that offend their sensibilities.  They aer so removed from the actual threats and sacrifices in life, they've lost touch with that reality.  They will learn - once the government they support is installed and they become the first to be eliminated. An all powerful state no longer needs them to lie and distort and distract to assume control - ditto the Media.




Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Uncertain Sciences

Uncertain Science & Physics

This Sentience Thesis proposes the consciousness is comprised of unique sub-atomic matter.  The consciousness captures and accrues that matter (electrons) from the physical senses: touch, taste, smell, sight, hearing, etc.  The sensory content is supplemented with cognitive activity – deliberations, ideas, and choices, made while on earth.  The matter acquired from both sources sum to constitute the consciousness or soul.  The Thesis additionally asserts the content of the soul predicates a person’s eligibility for, and ability to survive, the eternal environment termed the afterlife.  The process of accruing matter is persistent and uninterrupted.  Each conscious and unconscious action and thought in life adds to the souls’ content.  It’s a remarkable process.

A variety of academic and secular disciplines were investigated to compose and validate the Sentience Thesis.  There are portions that require a thinking cap.  Be prepared.  I had to dumb some topics and concepts down to the lowest common denominator.  Frankly, I was initially unable to understand some postulates and hypothesis.  Reading… and re-reading… and re-re-reading… (Occasionally more times) was a process to which I grew accustomed.  Once the concepts and basics of quantum are understood, the principles and many details unravel.  Quantum physics is a marvelous study.  It tasks the brain and delves into the essence of matter and life on the smallest (known) scale.  Nothing exists without atoms and quarks - no matter, no energy, nothing.

Like most every discipline, or human endeavor, there are differences of opinion and divergent interpretations in quantum physics.  Some of the unresolved conflicts in quantum are strident and remarkable.  The disputed areas form fundamental and unavoidable concepts for physics and the Thesis.  They define “accepted and acceptable” properties and values associated with variables used in the equations that constitute essential principles of quantum physics.  Several critical assumptions in quantum were thus formed.  They are indispensable to the discipline.  Unbelievably, these differences remain unresolved one hundred years hence. 

“God does not roll dice.” was Einstein’s remark when one of the first “equation only” quantum assumptions arose - The Copenhagen Effect… The Uncertainty Principle.  Niels Bohr and Werner Heisenberg postulated the interpretation in 1927.  The Copenhagen Effect, or Uncertainty Principle, is an implicit quantum assumption.  It is central to comprehending quantum from a conditional, “ideological” view and it’s a doozey.  This assumption allows science to have reality both ways.  Incorporating uncertainty as reference standard assured absolutes are optional.  Absolutes required for other branches of science are conditional variables in quantum studies by design. 

  One component of the atom, the electron, is the focus of the Uncertainty Principle and the Thesis.  The electron is a curious and confounding sub-atomic component.  Words become very important here.  Component is used because science lacks the ability to determine if the electron is a wave, or a particle, or something else. 
Examining the atom is helpful to coordinate terminology.  The above image of the smallest atom, hydrogen, (above) reveals it contains one electron and one proton. The static image resembles a solar system – but it is crucial to know the electron is always in motion at light speed and it never stops.  In the image, the proton is larger.  It is the “sun” object for this purpose – and it is fixed.  The electron is the planet object orbiting the sun/proton.  It moves at the speed of light (maybe faster).  The image is almost correct.  But as you read above, the precise location of the electron has never been determined – not once.  Electrons, accordingly, remain an uncertain area of study and that is troublesome for several reasons.  When science began examining the generic atom, the electron’s location could not be determined – absolutely, precisely.  The size and relative location of each sub-atomic component is essential to comprehending the operations of each constituent part within the atom. 

To better comprehend the relationships within an atom, let’s enlarge our atom to the size of Yankee stadium. Enlarged, the proton is the size of a baseball on the pitcher’s mound/middle of the stadium.  The electron becomes the size of a BB – the ammunition used in a Red Rider rifle from the Christmas Story movie.  The electron is located at the bleacher farthest away from the pitcher’s mound in center field.  This enlarged example reveals the approximated size of the components and the distance between them. 

What appears a substantial empty space between the components of the atom may, or may not, actually exist.  Incredibly small objects moving at light speed in a correspondingly small environment, an environment where the objects are theorized to change states, and into other components, and, where the energy present influences the internal domain of the individual atom and the atoms with which they covalently congregate to form other matter and elements, is admittedly an extremely difficult task.   Physicists and scientists “discover” new components of sub-atomic matter – quarks with improved technologies and enhanced methods.  The potential for matter smaller than the sub-atomic components studied additionally exists.  What is known and accepted as fact is a temporary state.  New technologies regularly reveal new information, new facts; that are replaced once better technology and investigation methods enables that advance.  Conjecture and theory are established using the most current information that is believed substantiated and verified. 

When you touch a solid object, you actually make contact with the extremely small electron orbiting around the proton - at light speed.  What the human senses detect as solid matter is presumed a tiny object orbiting a proportionally vast empty space.  Our fingers do not sense movement because of the small size and speed of the electrons in the matter touched and within the finger.  The defects of human anatomy and biology delay transmitting the sensation instantaneously.  Detection of an object that small is not possible, owed to the imprecise qualities of the human body – fingertip.   The diameter of the hydrogen atom is calculated as approximately one million times smaller than the human hair. The diameter ranges from about 0.1 to 0.5 nanometers (1 × 10-10 m to 5 × 10-10 m).  The electron’s small orbit at light speed makes locating the electron, using the technology currently available impossible.  Science may eventually develop technology to locate the electron.  But science and physicists refused to wait.

When science realized they lacked the technology and ability to conclusively determine the precise location of the electron – they faced a choice. Admit they couldn’t do it, or, develop math expressions to approximate a guess on the electron’s location.  Science formed the equation - hence the Uncertainty Principle.  This principle uses calculated guesswork to offer several “potential” electron locations.  This choice infuriated some scientists and physicists.  They objected.  They demanded quantum adhere to the same restrictions imposed on every other discipline.  Obviously, their objections were noted, but not applied.  The Uncertainty Principle was incorporated, codified, and in conjunction with other math expressions, pressed the study of quantum forward.  Each subsequent guess on the electron further clouds reality and the actual information sought, and needed, to explore accurately… responsibly…  within the limits of the Scientific Method and basic philosophical truths.  What approximations miss (the errors present and created) stand to be significant.  The information lost and errors compound each time the calculation is used and a new equation is layered upon the previous equation(s).  In lieu of tangible, precise information, the exact properties of an electron cannot be determined by approximation.  Truth is masked.  A generic, utilitarian, approximated value makes due. 

The known and accepted properties and behaviors of the electron – as might be expected – are bizarre, maddening, and occasionally impossible – compared to classic physics and other tangible and accepted laws of science.  The electron’s uncertainty tortures “conventional” logic and rationality. 

Science wanted to discover legitimate evidence regarding the electron/photon and devised an experiment to collect the evidence – the Dual Slit.  This experiment exposed the disturbing and confounding properties of the electron and the “Uncertain” reality that partially defines it.  The Dual Slit experiment was one of the earliest quantum investigations designed. The outcome of the Dual Slit experiment must have blown the physicist’s minds – and frustrated their objectives.  The outcome has not changed since the first attempt.  When analyzed – the results continue to challenge rational evaluations and expectations.  It also redefines our perceived physical and metaphysical realities – depending upon your perspective.  The results display God’s remarkable ability to confound man and science in plain sight.  The answers are present.  At least one is glaring and obvious.  It is science’s prejudiced standards of evaluation that compromise and confounds their efforts.

The design of the Dual Slit experiment involves shooting a stream of electrons/photons through two barriers placed a few inches away from the device emitting the electrons.  The barriers and capture plate are staggered – each a few inches apart moving away from the electron “gun”.  The first barrier has one vertical slit.  A second barrier sits behind the first and contains two vertical slits.  The electron/photons passing thru the slits in both barriers impacts a capture plate where the electron locations are recorded, verified, and analyzed.

Any stream of electrons/photons used in the Dual Slit experiment are (assumed) waves of matter as they leave the gun.  This description of electrons is what science initially thought.  The results of the Dual Slit experiment recalibrated and re-defied what science thought.  The pattern the electrons/photons produced on the capture plate (in a rational world) should resemble the light waves shot through the double slits.  That did not happen.  Unexpectedly, dots, particles of matter (not waves) accumulated into groups that formed columns on the capture plate.  The far right portion of the image below shows how the particles arranged.  The electrons were presumed in waveform when released from the gun - based upon previous behaviors observed.  Defying expectations and rationality, when the capture plate was examined the anticipated collection of waves had changed, and became a collection of particles that formed an amazing pattern.

 

There are only two slits on the second barrier plate.   How these particles arranged themselves into columns of particles remains unknown to this day.  Amazingly, if a wider capture screen is used, there are more groups of rows.  It appears the waves/particles organize themselves into ordered groups.  The electrons also form a “graduated” image like shading.  The electrons gather into what may be compared to vertical cylinders in repeating gradations of intensity.  Columns of intense, compacted particles gradually fade to very few particles, then back to intense columns of particles - repeatedly. 


The capture screen is flat – essentially two-dimensional.  Nothing in the configuration of the capture plate contributes to the pattern produced; that science can determine. 

The act of experimentation - capturing physical evidence of the electron/photon using specific conditions, defied rational expectations.  Particles, not waves were produced.  The environment created by the conducting experiment, can be inferred to influence or determine the components quantum state!  The experiment, potentially, reveals the electron can exist in either wave or particle state, or perhaps some other state (currently unknown) contingent upon specific environmental conditions.  Is it plausible the act of experimentation, an observer examining the component – trying to detect or capture the component, influenced, or predicated, the state the component adopted, and, when the state was adopted.  The cause and effect dynamics attributed to the component’s alternative state expands the potential rational explanations available.  Implying the electron/photon chose its state contingent upon the actions of the observer is rational.  Sentience is rational, potential condition, or quality, of the component.  The first observation of sentience - defined by the component reacting to the environment is feasible.  The second observation implies the sentience present inspired a response, or reaction “learned” from its predecessors.  Assuming a divine context and contribution, the sentience proposed aligns with phenomenon, explains causality, and supports the premise for a comprehensive, intelligent design; a divine design - God. Science ignoring the potential sentience ostensibly eliminates the possibility of a divine presence and influence.


More strange behaviors were noted as the study of electrons/photons expanded.  The sentience potential increases as the number of other inexplicable properties and behaviors of the electron/photon accumulate.  (Religion should embrace the results of this experiment and demand the most obvious potential explanation be considered.) 

A review of the amazing and unpredictable properties and behaviors observed in the electron/photon includes:
The electron/photon is a sub-atomic component
The electron/photon move at light speed
The electron/photon is conditionally both a wave AND a particle.
The component can occupy the different states and locations - simultaneously. 
The components, when entangled, can share “information” faster than light speed across vast distances. 

Electricity is the flow of electrons.  Electrical energy present in a body is recognized by medicine and science as evidence of life.  The presence of life is determined using an electro-encephalogram, EEG.  The EEG detects and measures electricity in the brain.   An absence of this energy indicates no life - death. 

The photon/electron’s known, and potential behaviors, are why this study is termed Sentient.  The results arising from the Dual-Slit experiment indicates the electron/photon potentially changes its state based upon the conditions in the environment the experiment, and observation, create.  Rational analysis of the information produced by the experiment’s several outcome(s) must include the observed phenomenon that indicates potential sentience: “to sense”. 

When science conducted the double slit experiment and encountered this inexplicable reality that defies classic physics (and common sense) they faced a significant quandary.  All the baffling behaviors needed explaining.  At the time of the first Dual Slit experiment, science only had classic physics for reference and basic analog tools to enhance their investigations.  Science couldn’t entirely explain the phenomena with the tools and information possessed.  New interpretations, and conclusions, and postulates, were created trying to explain what the Dual Slit experiment revealed – from a secular perspective… poorly.  The analysis and resulting interpretations did not locate a documented opinion that considered the potential for electron/photon sentience, nor did science conclude the potential of an undetected dimension present within the boundaries of the electron shell, or BOTH!

The explanation chosen by science served one concern well.  Science chose expedience.  Exploring the quantum realm using Uncertainty preserved their authority as the holders and givers of truth and fact.  Science refused to admit not enough information was known to form a credible and legitimate conclusion that explained the electrons behaviors in the Dual Slit – based upon traditional standards.  Conflicts arose between physicists and other disciplines of physics and science.  Quantum physics was a relatively new field of research.  Professional opportunities awaited those who could provide explanations for very small pieces of matter.  With few, or no comparative benchmarks established, and fewer experts able to comprehend the mathematical expressions used to validate, or disprove, the assertions made; complex equations and calibrated conjecture sufficed.

Not every physicist or scientist was content with the “uncertain” conclusions drawn.  Albert Einstein was one of several who rebuked the uncertainty findings.  Another was physicist Edwin Schrodinger.  Uncertainty, the Copenhagen Effect, moved Schrodinger to posit the Cat Paradox: 
A cat is placed inside a box with a deadly compound, that, if released, will kill the cat.  When a person opens the box to examine the cat, the act may trigger the deadly compound.  The cat will be alive, or dead – depending upon WHEN, (or, as learned from photon behaviors: “WHERE and potentially HOW”) a person opens the box to investigate the cat. 

The Copenhagen Effect permits mischief and introduces chance for causality.  Chance in mathematical calculations requires special operators.  Schrodinger, a young physicist seeking fame and fortune, complied and delivered - Ψ.  Other physicists added their own operators when conventional math failed to deliver, or was unable to design, the desired results.  Predictably, Schrodinger grew unhappy with the direction of quantum physics; the absence of verifiable and tangible evidence and controls among other concerns.  Erwin Schrodinger was an immense intellect who provided the discipline a formula and math operator to quantify chance, or change, overtime.  Schrodinger’s amazing work is evidence of his considerable mind.  He made profound statements that detail his dissatisfaction with the indeterminate structure of quantum physics that “evolved” within the discipline.

“I don’t like it (quantum mechanics) and I’m sorry I ever had anything to do with it.
“The verbal interpretation, on the other hand, i.e. the metaphysics of quantum physics, is on far less solid ground. In fact, in more than forty years physicists have not been able to provide a clear metaphysical model.”
"God knows I am no friend of probability theory, I have hated it from the first moment when our dear friend Max Born gave it birth. For it could be seen how easy and simple it made everything, in principle, everything ironed and the true problems concealed. Everybody must jump on the bandwagon [Ausweg]. And actually not a year passed before it became an official credo, and it still is."




Science continued trying to clarify the indeterminate, uncertain, state of the electron.  Niels Bohr calculated matrices of potential locations for electrons orbiting a nucleus in his work with Heisenberg – noted above.  Another physicist, Max Born, clarified Bohr’s analysis and suggested the electron/photon reside in a perpetual state of uncertainty.  Born’s Probability Density postulate suggests electrons/photons follow a predictable path, even if their location cannot be absolutely determined.  These behaviors form a “cloud” of probability density – see image below. 



The cloud metaphor is accurate.  It helps to visualize how the electron path creates the appearance and sensation of solid matter - when touched by a human hand or utilized.  Remember, though, the atom is presumed mostly empty space.  All matter on earth is comprised of atoms.  Concordantly, all matter is presumed mostly empty space.  Your body is no different.  Electrons whirling about at light speed in your finger tip make contact with moving electrons in any object touched and your brain comprehends a solid surface, or another state of matter.  Some matter, like a rock, is rigid and durable.  Other matter is fluid or gaseous.  Another stat is plasma.  Regardless of the state, all matter contains electrons spinning in an uncertain, indeterminate, orbit around various protons at light speed.  The number of protons, neutrons, and electrons determine the type, and weight of matter.  The more numerous the assemblies, the heavier it becomes.

Born’s postulate is significant because it implies “whole” electron particles are witnessed when the investigation of the experiment’s results is conducted. This contradicted Bohr’s conclusion that implied partial states, portions of electrons, are witnessed.  Both conclude the electron’s state is predicated on external investigation!  When acts of experimentation and examination seek to detect the electron, it changes its state in reaction to the investigation.   Science would term the most obvious explanation for the phenomena Super Natural.

The primary objective of the Sentience Theory is defining the human soul, or consciousness.  The soul consists of electrons/photons.  These objects of matter are essential and necessary for life - both human and animal.  Man enlarges his soul throughout a lifetime by accruing sensory experiences and conscious effort.  Combined with the behaviors acted out over a lifetime, man accrues and prepares his soul.  Per Einstein’s theory: Mass/Matter = Energy.  Further, classic science contends matter cannot be created nor destroyed.  This contention assumes all the matter in the universe was always present - a static assumption.  Additionally, the contention asserts matter cannot be destroyed or removed from the physical universe. 

The matter comprising a human consciousness, or soul, exits the body at death, or becomes undetectable.  Religion contends – the soul departs the body for an unknown location.  At future predetermined time, God interprets the content of the soul and judges the individual.  God then places the soul in an environment, and perhaps another vessel/body, where the individual continues on their eternal journey.  The consciousness, or soul, continues acquiring more data, information, expanding their intellect throughout eternity. 

 Relevant information arising from the study suggests the electron/photon is a unique component of an atom that contains and displays properties that are currently incomprehensible - due to technological limitations and the scale of the environment studied.  The Thesis asserts the electron/photon that provides life is an undetermined and unrecognized sub-atomic component.  The component exhibits sentience - a predictable response to external stimuli.  Evidence further suggests the electrons defy rational expectation and traditional classification.  An interpretation the electrons/photons are not universal, homogenous, sub-atomic components is cogent and stable -based upon evaluating the phenomena observed and available evidence. 


The uncertainty within the discipline of quantum mechanics suggests once investigation passes inside the atom shell (the orbit of the electron around the nucleus) many of the accepted laws that define classic physics change.  One component of the atom, the electron/photon, also displays characteristics that appear to defy classic views on reality and life - as we know it.  If conceptual reality, the reality bound to the laws defined as “classic (Newtonian) physics” - changes inside the atomic shell - the atom, the universe, the mysteries of God, our souls, and the continuity of the physical world - correspondingly changes.  If true, this infers the physical laws embraced by mankind and used in assessing the universe are not yet comprehensively understood.  A duality may exist in the reality recognized due to the limitations resident in perception.  Potentially, a different dimension, or the physical laws that order the sub-atomic domain, exists inside the boundaries of the electron shell!  Both conditions, new dimension and alternative rules are potentially accurate.   If the conditions predicated by the premise are valid, all the matter in the known universe is subject to, and influenced by, at least two sets of laws, and, life is far more complicated than currently assessed and presumed.  The Miller-Urey experiment and postulate infers and substantiates this conclusion. 

The Eternal Consciousness/Soul - a Quantum Enigma

There was no way of avoiding the conclusion my adopting prayer for an answer signaled I failed.   Failure was not an option I preferred, but my efforts left no real alternative.  Convincing myself I had no choice, and actually left no stone unturned, required a “comprehensive” investigation of all the information potentially available - reasoned and ludicrous.  Only then, could I honestly end the matter - and excuse my failing to find the answer on my own.  Besides, I knew assistance from a God would not be forthcoming.

I continued the prayers and my studies; convinced both efforts were pointless.  Prayer, however, provided an ancillary benefit.  The lack of divine intervention in answering the question permitted my cementing a belief no God existed.  As the days passed with no divine input, a laborious tedium infected the study.  I began re-reading some material that appealed to me for reasons not linked to the eternity question. Distractions also surfaced as I found previously missed concepts, phenomena, and conjecture that ranged from unusual to bizarre in the revisited material.  Unorthodox relationships and properties became apparent contemplating the behaviors of the electron/photon.  If specific associations were made, those conditions might bear upon the physical composition of the human consciousness. The consciousness might very well contain those components.  After all, human life was verified by measuring electrical activity in the body.  The consciousness was either a segment of human life, or a separate entity.  The inconsistencies within the consciousness were numerous, just like the electron/photon.  The mind often functioned perfectly despite injury or physical afflictions that compromised other areas of the body.  Catatonia was a radical separation of the two.  Spinal injuries were another.  Unusual phenomenon and missed relationships that altered my perspective materialized.  A terror unexpectedly startled me; like failing to see a threat, so perfectly camouflaged in the trappings of habits it goes undetected.  When it leaps to claim your life, it is so close a defensive respond is impossible and incompetent.

The moment the connections between the electron and consciousness became obvious severed my conceptual continuity, and incapacitated the minute reserves of competence remaining - credibility crumbs I preciously guarded like my integrity depended upon it.  A wave of remorse crushed me.  My beliefs shattered simultaneously.  I lost all confidence in my rational abilities with a sigh.  An immense vacancy in my intellect appeared.  A word I seldom used, but particularly appealed to me, entered my thoughts.  It perfectly described my situation – feckless.  My selfish priorities and the recently distilled intellectual solvency dissolved, like a hologram when the viewer’s perspective changes. The hierarchy of secular, indispensable conclusions about God I previously adopted with smug self-assuredness and rebellious indignation, dissembled under the revelation. These needed significant re-ordering.  A remarkable moment of exhilaration was replaced with astonished embarrassment.  The answer to the question entirely resided within the inexplicable and indeterminate quantum concept of “uncertainty”.

A sensory overload ensued considering all the potentials of uncertainty.  Uncertainty - the phenomenon that inferred sub-atomic states and quark properties (including potential sentience) and other extraordinary behaviors that defied classic, Newtonian physics, and subordinate scientific concepts and truths, stared back at me - blankly.  The confounding, contradictory phenomena and observed properties of uncertainty, mandated considering an extraneous, foreign, maybe alien, or, divine interdiction was ultimately responsible for the electron’s composition and behavior.  The electron’s creation was subject to the same intervention.  If the requisite, unsubstantiated, premise offered to legitimize the speculation explaining the origin of the universe does not account for the Uncaused First Cause - and - the matter, energy, and CHANCE, required to initiate that uncaused causality are concordantly unsubstantiated, unverifiable; pocked and marred with inconsistencies and overly hopeful interpretations; the source of that matter. and energy, and Chance, continues - anonymously, undetermined... Uncertain!  Chance, happenstance, “fate”, assumes omniscient importance as it rises to preeminence - the exclusive and fundamental causality for the scientific version of universal conception; and its progeny - the adjacent reality presumed.  This concept no longer made sense.  I expected better from science.

The electron/photon was matter moving at light speed.  Matter at that velocity overcomes the restrictions time imposes!  Potentially, a new dimensional time paradigm is available, and obtained.  Eternity is an absence of time.  Analogous relationships and obvious conclusion next materialized.  The human consciousness, the soul, is comprised of electrons/photons.  If that is true, eternal life was probable - much more than possible.  If the electron/photon comprised the soul, a God could exist, and probably existed.

As the facts and evidence materialized and aligned, I awoke from a self induced, decades long, cognitive coma.  I could no longer pretend God was Mr. Irrelevant.  Somehow, God fit perfectly into the evidence, and complimented ancillary conditions.  In desperation, I sought out conflicting evidence – to reaffirm my previous suspicions and conclusions no God was possible.  That search delivered more profound support refuting my efforts.  The divine connections and relationships were unavoidable, and, undeniable.  Then, philosophical factors materialized to insult and compound my fecklessness.  The divine variable united the ingredients with an eloquent equilibrium and undeniable surety.  The strict isolation protocols I planned, (separating the two perspectives to preserve my disbelief in God) ran together like colors in an Impressionist painting.  I saw the contingent continuity, how each component relied upon the other in a comprehensive collage of coordinated precision - perfection.  The majesty of a design that deftly, and delicately, subdued order for both extremes of magnitude and provided the environment where every particle of matter enjoys its relative and objective purpose across dimensions and timescales my feeble human mind could not comprehend, stunned me. My secular concentration subsided contritely.  The answer was unconditionally conditional.

God’s affections for mankind were bound within the collage.  That realization crippled my emotions.  It wasn’t overt.  God’s love was a mundane object my emotional misgivings overlooked.  It blended into the background of familiarity, and contempt blinded my considering it.  I slowly recognized and interpreted God’s collective handiwork.  No matter where I cast my gaze or directed my thoughts, irrefutable proof of God’s design and affections stood with guilt.  Guilt’s I told you so expression was unmistakable.  He mocked me and ridiculed my self styled intellectual prowess.  I had no rebuttal or rationale for argument.

God had blessed me in ways I ignored.  His favor continued despite my insufferable and petulant behaviors.  The paternal emotions expressed tolerated and transcended my volatility and vituperation; patiently waiting for me to respond and accept the gift – unconditionally.  Prodigal?  Didn’t matter. Welcomed back?  Yep.  The glut of evidence before me comprehensively convicted my incoherent secular conclusions.  Guilt gloated.  Years of anxiety and fears escaped the sanctuary of sanity and poured onto my face.  I couldn’t contain them or my shame and wept uncontrollably.

I felt the weight of disappointment my behaviors and choices expressed upon the sire of my soul.  Evidence of affection from the father I believed abandoned me was indisputable and ubiquitous.  It condemned my rationality, and arrogance.  The necessary limitations and obligations of the divine design precluded communication using the physical components of earthly life.  The frustrations of being unable to commune with the content of consciousness apportioned, or impart touch past a superficial, conceptual contact, were profound, and pitiful.  The emotions held for me on the alternative axis of reality prompted dread, and an anxious exhilaration simultaneously.  The magnitude and consequence of my disobedience, the quantum of emotions, bound to the consciousness shared with my celestial father aligned.  The gravity of the choices defining my life, temporal and eternal, clarified my disgrace.  I had no response of worth, and lacked the justification to express one.  Those choices… my choices: excuses, distractions, and deflections of responsibility summed to a contemptible certainty, and truth.  I dishonored the precious gift entrusted to me.  What remained in my life was an abbreviated opportunity I must not squander.  Salvaging the remnants of my soul required an unfamiliar and sustained effort for an uncertain end.  Shame shuttered my surroundings as I contemplated condemnation and the reserves of repentance available.

Changing a life like mine is not simple, nor is it linear.  It’s inordinately complicated with habits, appetites, and dependencies, perpetuating comfort and complacency - colluding to derail improvement.  Looking back on my life, and the damage inflicted from my heart and hand, will always be a legacy I am loathe to admit, but must.  Each day, if I accomplish a new good, I pray it eases God’s disappointment with me.  I earned whatever judgment comes my way.  What I hope to avoid is missing out on Divine Dad’s company.  With the secular blinders removed, I’ve grown to like and admire him.  I want to learn more from him.  If I miss out on his instruction I’ll have myself to blame.  For now, I’m content he is willing to assist me, provide direction, and love me.  Considering my past, I deserve other treatment.  Grace and compassion are a concept I’m slow to comprehend.  It’s that knucklehead part deeply ingrained within me.

The answer I'd discovered was affixed to a second realization - the external pressures of environment and society directly imperil the soul's integrity, ascension, and survival.  Spiritual salvation was necessarily compromised by the environment society creates.  It contributed to the physical content of the soul.  The concept of the afterlife and the physical reality that define and determine the soul's content integrated perfectly.  A sobering fear invaded my attention.  My failures with God were but a part of the offenses I permitted through my action and inaction.  My generation allowed and encouraged the demise of decency. We sat by and observed the secular confiscation of basic human liberties, and degradation of religion and God.  Secular interests conspired to eliminate Christianity and the ability of the individual soul to achieve salvation. We tolerated the depreciation of society to gluttonously indulge the appetites the depreciation freed.  Too few of my ilk objected. Contemporaneously, Christians and other religions bickered over technical deviations derived from hair splitting on scriptural interpretation.  Infighting was easier than confronting the enemy that threatened God – secular humanism and moral equivalency .

The revelation contained within the discovery led me to become a Moral Disciple.  My studies were only beginning.  I’d broadened my references.  Any source of information or history that pertains to Christ and God are valid references in my study – unless, in reading them I find irrelevant, or caustic material that contextually critiques Christianity, vilifies Christ, or gratuitously discredits God and religion seeking to support a secular worldview that purposely avoids intellectual honesty and contemptuously assaults Christianity misusing the First Amendment protection enumerated.  This journey of coherent spiritual discovery was an elucidating, powerful experience that altered my perspectives and changed my beliefs in a meaningful and permanent manner.